On Poetry and Fathers
by
Justice Putnam
The one thing
That always amazed me
Even from the
Earliest moment
Of your life
Was the utter trust
You had in me
And I was struck
At the time
By the amount
Of doubt
I had in myself.
Even though
Your mother and I
Had half a year
To practice breathing
I doubted that
I could remember
Properly when to
Encourage the right
Breath
And when the doctor
Said I could assist
And I finally held
You
Gray and small
I thought to that
Distant day
When you would
Hold your own son
In the same way
And I thought of
The resolve you would
Have
Just as I had
To love
Like no other
Father has loved.
So the years pass
And I doubt
You felt the
Prayer of love
Over that distance
And separation
You grew in.
A correspondence
Is a poor substitute
For a kiss
Yet each word
Was a universe
Of touch
I doubt it
Was enough.
I cannot now
Apologize
For all that you
Went through
I wish it were
Otherwise
But mere words
And sentiment
Are hollow.
You are now
A father
Kiss your son
While you can
Circumstance
Has a way
Of intruding
Upon the best
Of plans
And apologies
Become terrible
Temptations.
© 2004 by Justice Putnam
and Mechanisches-Strophe Verlagswesen
(This piece has appeared in the Berkeley Daily Planet and Art in a Liberal Frame.)
