14 May 2009

Dawkins Confesses: "Evolution is a Marxist Conspiracy!"

Dawkins Confesses: "Evolution is a Marxist Conspiracy!"


Senior Travel Editor
Gerry Bronco

Washington, DC-- British ethologist, evolutionary biologist and popular science author, Richard Dawkins, confessed in a series of interrogations early last year that the Earth is only six thousand years old and the teaching of Evolution is a conspiracy by Marxist elements.

According to former senior officials of the Bush Department of Faith-Based Initiatives, Dawkins was apprehended in February of 2008 and secretly renditioned to a foreign black site where the interrogations took place.

"He was one of the most difficult of the high value targets we've come across," a former senior official remarked, "we waterboarded him 183 times before he confessed."

Sleep deprivation, stress positions and other enhanced techniques were also used, according to a little noticed chart included along with the more well-known of the so-called, torture memos.

Dawkins came to prominence with his 1976 book The Selfish Gene, which popularized the gene-centered view of evolution. In 1982, he made a widely cited contribution to evolutionary biology with the theory, presented in his book The Extended Phenotype, that the phenotypic effects of a gene are not necessarily limited to an organism's body, but can stretch far into the environment, including the bodies of other organisms.

A prominent critic of creationism and intelligent design, Dawkins was targeted by the Department of Faith-Based Initiatives, according to the former senior official, who spoke on condition of anonymity because of the issue's sensitivity.

"We saw how well the Department of Defense contractors had interrogating Abu Zubaydah and Khalid Sheik Muhammed," the senior official stated, "it was imperative to find evidence of an al Qaida-Iraq collaboration. Without the enhanced interrogations, that link never would have been established. The Department of Faith-Based Initiatives and other departments of the Bush Adminstration were mandated to codify threat levels to their mission. Dawkins was deemed an immediate threat, a ticking time-bomb and was renditioned off-shore."

Dawkins also confessed that Regent University and The Discovery Institute are pre-eminent institutions and have been criminally maligned by secret Marxist cells.

When asked why Dawkins' confession was not made public last year, the senior official pointed to the recent decision by the Texas State Textbook and Curriculum to include intelligent design in that state's science textbooks.

"Actionable intelligence is utilized when needed," the senior official said, "Dawkins' confessions were of little use last year. But with the many Bush loyalists burrowed throughout the Obama administration, expect to see more of these revelations made public as criticism of the previous administration mounts."

© 2009 by Justice Putnam
and Mechanisches-Strophe Verlagswesen

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